And, of course, every time I think I know someone well enough to foresee what they’re going to drink, and I present them with their supposed favourite liquor proudly, they say: You know, yes, I used to love it, but the last time I went to a party I had such a good fun on… You can’t win!

I think it’s true that a Polish party is a clique. It’s not that we don’t like meeting new people, but rather that we want those people to come about whom we know we’re going to have fun with. And then if they bring new people, and the new ones mix with the present company well and add to everyone’s fun, they’re going to be put on the guests list the next time, or even might be added to one of the guests’ own guests list. Generally, Poles think that the right people make for a good party, so they don’t necessarily follow the rule the more the merrier.

That would take you back to your whippersnapper times fo’ sho’!

Still, I think Micheal made the golden point. A Polish party is a clique.

And I’m still convinced that Poles pretend they’re going to drink far less than they actually are. I’ve never been to a Polish party that hasn’t run out of alcohol before it’s run out of steam (these two fact may not be entirely unconnected).

I personally find that, in particular, seafood and spicy food (or any combination thereof e.g. Jambalaya) go over a bit on the rough side when it comes to Poles. However they do seem to be open to new mixed drinks. Left on their own, though, it’s probably vodka and juice (orange).

I prefer to let someone else organize the party, as long as I have my say as to when (Saturday, 8pm) and where (preferably outside in a garden with a big picnic table or at a friend’s nice flat with a big plasma tv). Then all the tedious inviting and food is left to someone else. Plus I can still bring my favorite brain detergents and maybe introduce someone to the joys of mixing tequila and champagne.

Of course you’re right – nobody touches this stuff; they all eat my wife’s salad and sernik.

The night usually ends with me dancing on my own in the middle of the room in an intoxicated trance to my choice of music with everyone sat miserably watching me.

But I have fun! :) But really – it’s the only way I can stay sane…!

I sober up on sernik in the morning.

The best parties I ever had were two, well really one with a reprise, that were held in the late 70′s at my parent’s house in London while they were away on holiday. It was the summer waiting for ‘A’ level exam results so I suppose we were all 18 years old. I’m ashamed to speak of the damage we did – my parent’s bed was soaking (never did find out why), there was vomit in places there shouldn’t be vomit, the house smelled like a distillery for weeks afterwards, for at least 6 months we were finding peanuts everywhere, the newly sanded and polished floorboards in the lounge were ruined by stiletto heels – but BOY did we have fun! The parties were the stuff of legends, surprised there isn’t a www site devoted to them in fact.

If I recall correctly, my mates and I attempted to clean as best we could (you can imagine how good 18 yr old guys can clean) and then went on holiday to the Isle of Wight shortly before my parent’s got back from their holiday. There then followed that awkward phone call where my parent’s got to explain that not only had I trashed their house but I had also managed to fail all my exams!!

I think that was probably the low point in my career as #1 son! :)